The Land of Mango Sunsets (Continued)
I was a very young girl then with an empty head, who knew little more than the accumulated experience of a nearly idyllic reality. I did not know yet about heartbreak and I was not old enough to have the sense to plan for a future or even to think of one. Wasn't that day enough? Yes, it was. When we were on Sullivans Island we lived from day to day without a care in the world, or so it seemed to me.
The story, this story I want to tell you is all true. It may not always be pleasant to hear and I know that much of the time you won't agree with me and the things I have done. I was not always nice. But if you will indulge me just a bit, in the end I think you will see things a little more from my perspective. That's a large part of the point of this. Recognizing yourself mirrored in my mistakes won't be pretty but perhaps it will keep both of us from making the same mistakes again.
I am on the porch now, rocking back and forth in Miss Josephine's rocking chair. In my ear, I can hear the lilt of her honeyed voice and feel the touch of her hand on my shoulder. She's telling me the same thing I am going to show you.
Things happen for a reason. You'll see what I mean. Think of all the times you have told yourself, well, I wish someone had given me a clue. Or, why didn't I see that coming? How could I have been so stupid? Or what's the point of trying? Those thoughts always occurred when you were about to learn a lesson in life.
I am older now and it doesn't matter anymore if someone thinks I am a fool. It makes me laugh because I have been a fool so often that if you could stack the occasions one upon another, they would reach the top of the sky and then spiral away into their own orbit. But I hope I am a fool no longer. If I catch myself falling back into my old ways I would like to think I would just forgive myself, pick up and carry on. I know now what matters.
Think of a heavy key chain and this story is one of the keys. Use it on the quest toward the happiness there is to be found in life on this wretched but beautiful earth. It's not the answer to everything, but it might help. Let's start at the height of my stupidity.